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Your Money Blueprint: The Third Influence — Specific Incident part 2
Let me give you another example of a specific incident that closer to home.
When my wife was 7 years old, she would hear the clanging bells of ice candy man coming down the street. She would run to her mom and ask for 25 paise. Her mom would reply, “Sorry, dear I don’t have any money. Go ask DAD. He has got all the money.” My wife would then go and ask her dad. He would give her the money, she would go get her ice-candy, and she was a happy camper.
Week after week, the same incident would repeat itself. So what did my wife learnt about money?
First, that men have all the money. So once we got married, what do you think she expected of me? That’s right: money. And I’ll tell you what, she wasn’t asking for 25 paise anymore! Somehow she’d graduated.
Second, she learned that women don’t have money. If her mom (the deity) didn’t have money, obviously this is the way she should be.
To validate that way of being, she would subconsciously get rid of all her money. She was quite precise about it too. If I give her Rs. 100 note, she’d spend Rs. 100. If I gave her Rs. 500, she would spend Rs. 500, and if I give her Rs. 1000, she would spend Rs. 1000.
At one point, she took one of my courses; and learned about the art of leverage. I gave her Rs. 2000 and she spent Rs. 10,000! I tried to explain, “No honey, leverage means we are the one who are supposed to *get* the Rs. 10,000, not spend it”. Somehow it wasn’t sinking in.
The only thing we ever fought about was money. It almost cost our marriage. What we didn’t know at the time was the meanings each of us attributed to money were radically different. To my wife, money meant immediate pleasure (as in enjoying her ice candy.) I on the other hand, grew up with the belief that money was meant to be accumulated as a means to create freedom.
Thank goodness we learned to revise each of our money blueprint.
Feel free to share your specific incident about money and discover how it is impacting you currently.
Till then, be connected.